dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
