i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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