Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
