She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Randomize
