She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
He better not be in your backpack
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
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