going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
