I bet he comes in French.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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