You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
I just found puke in my bra..
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize