Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
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