No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
