Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Randomize
