saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
