I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
