i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
