Can Purell be used as lube?
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Randomize
