yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize