It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
