My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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