We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
It's blow job season.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
