somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
