i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize