In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
