At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
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