Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Randomize
