Please, let me fuck your mom
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
