But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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