I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
