So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize