NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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