Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Randomize
