I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Randomize
