I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
