dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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