I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
