I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Randomize
