Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
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