Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
zippers are such a cool invention
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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