He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
