wat bout pragnant strippers??
Is it because I queefed?
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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