Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
