I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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