Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I think people are normalizing furries
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
