I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Randomize
