I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize