Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
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