Just mADE A PArabola og urine
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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