i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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