the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I got inside last night via doggy door
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
