Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize