Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
