I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
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