once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
